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Stop Chasing, Start Cultivating: Building Real Donor Relationships


Ever felt like you're endlessly chasing donors who just aren't that into you? It’s time to rethink your strategy. In this episode of "Let's Talk Fundraising," we delve deep into the common pitfalls of chasing elusive donors and offer actionable insights on shifting focus towards those who genuinely resonate with your mission. Drawing inspiration from Kevin L Brown's thought-provoking LinkedIn post and the expertise of sales guru Liz Wendling, we explore the signs that it's time to move on from unresponsive donors and how to maintain your dignity and confidence while doing so.



A key takeaway from this episode is the principle of "cultivating what grows," inspired by the resilient gardeners of New Mexico. Just as not every plant thrives in the harsh desert climate, not every donor relationship is worth the chase. By aligning our efforts with those who are genuinely interested, we can foster meaningful relationships that lead to transformative support for our communities. This analogy emphasizes the importance of investing time and energy into connections that bear fruit, rather than pursuing those that lead to dead ends.


The episode opens with a thought-provoking question: why are we chasing donors who don’t want to be caught? Often, the answer lies in a misguided belief that wealthy or high-profile individuals are the key to fundraising success. However, this approach can lead to a cycle of desperation, where fundraisers waste time and resources on uninterested parties. Instead, by focusing on donors who show genuine interest and engagement, organizations can build stronger, more impactful relationships.


Liz Wendling, a renowned sales expert, offers five critical tips to recognize when it's time to stop pursuing a donor. First, if a donor isn’t willing to set up another meeting, it's a clear sign to stop asking. Persistence in this scenario often comes across as desperation, which can be off-putting. Second, if a donor doesn’t ask tough questions about your pitch or refuses to answer your tough questions, they likely aren't that interested. Engaged donors will want to know the ins and outs of your mission and how their contributions will make a difference.


Third, if a donor is secretive or coy, it's a red flag that they don’t want you to know more about them and are hoping you'll stop reaching out. Fourth, if they don’t return calls and emails after multiple attempts, it's time to give it a break. Everyone gets busy, but consistent non-responsiveness indicates a lack of interest. Lastly, if a donor isn’t happy to see you, they’re not your person. As fundraisers, bringing joy and positivity should be a part of every interaction. If no one is happy to see you, it might be time for some self-reflection on how you’re presenting yourself and your organization.


The concept of "cultivating what grows" is further illustrated through the wisdom of New Mexico's high desert gardeners. These gardeners understand that not every seed will thrive in their challenging environment. Instead, they focus their efforts on plants that can withstand the harsh conditions, ensuring a fruitful harvest. This approach is directly applicable to fundraising. By investing in donors who are responsive and enthusiastic about your mission, you can cultivate relationships that will yield substantial support and make a meaningful impact.


This episode also addresses the emotional aspect of fundraising. The constant chase can lead to feelings of frustration and inadequacy. By shifting focus to donors who genuinely care, fundraisers can regain their confidence and sense of purpose. This positive energy, in turn, attracts more like-minded supporters, creating a virtuous cycle of engagement and generosity.


This episode of "Let's Talk Fundraising" offers invaluable insights into the art of donor cultivation. By recognizing when to move on from unresponsive donors and focusing on those who show genuine interest, fundraisers can build stronger, more impactful relationships. The principle of "cultivating what grows" serves as a powerful reminder to invest time and energy where it truly matters. Tune in to learn how to break free from the cycle of desperation and start building real, transformative donor relationships.

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